Are men less romantic than women? The answer is no. Men like to make women feel loved; they pride themselves on this accomplishment. Any man who has ever fallen in love with a woman likes to feel that he has seduced and won her over. It’s a big ego boost. But romance is approached differently by men (as if you didn’t already know).
Forget what you’ve heard about men not being romantic, it’s simply not true. Men love to be romantic, they love to seduce and woo over. They just need a reason to do it!!
From the male point of view, what is romance?
Romance is taking a chance. The first time you went out together, sat and talked one to one, or made love, you both took a chance with the encounter. It was romantic because everything was new and unknown. Romance is in part a feeling of risk; the risk of your heart breaking, the risk of being vulnerable, the risk of having to perform for another and face a rejection. Men face this risk just as equally as women.
When a relationship is established, routine sets in and chance is almost totally gone. You both know each other; you both agree that you love each other. You fell in love with each other because you wanted to know each other forever. Simply put, there is no more mystery.
People start to lose romantic feelings for each other when forever has become today.
Before you start, remember this one principal. Tattoo it to your arm if needs be, but by all means make a strong effort to remember it:
The only person in the world you can control is yourself.
You can let other people know what you want and desire, but by no means can you control them. The 3 tips in this article are for you to do. It is advisable to put romance back into your relationship on a slow but daily basis. If you do one thing from the following list every day, without fail, you will see a difference in time. Be patient and consistent and remind yourself of why you are doing what you are doing.
1. Make quick, decisive decisions – This may sound unimportant, maybe even a bit too forward depending on your comfort level, but do it. Say things like “I want chicken for dinner” or “Let’s go to this place next weekend.” And don’t give in to your decision without a compromise on his part. Difficult women are attractive for 2 reasons: A. These women know what they like, and 2. They aren’t easily pushed around and therefore, command respect. And if a decisive woman who knows what she likes is with me… well then, what does that say about me as her husband? (male pride would answer ‘you must be pretty good’). But PLEASE don’t confuse this with bitchiness or cruelty; approach this as an innocent game of playing or teasing. Whatever it is you want, no matter how trivial, don’t give in without a fight.
2. At times, seem aloof and distant – A huge part of romance is the unknown or mysterious nature of a person, and a big mistake that women make in relationships is to reveal and talk about everything. While this can bring about trust and bonding, it’s also a means to which people can become very quickly complacent and bored with each other. Always remember, being aloof does not mean keep secrets or withhold significant information. It means not being forthcoming with information and attention all the time. Try this the next time you can, instead of looking at your husband, don’t. Ignore him, look away. Instead of telling him when he asks, “How was your day”, just say “Fine”. Spend a few hours alone just doing ‘your own thing’. Be unconcerned with him for a few hours or a night or two. The key is to make him feel curious about you, to want to know more. Men love to hunt, and they will chase you if you give them reason to. Don’t be so free and giving with your attention.
3. Give quick bursts of lust – Remind your husband, in quick and unpredictable ways, that he makes you want him sexually; that he is highly sexually desirable to you. This is very easy to do. It requires you whisper lustful words into his ear at any opportune, random moment. Surprise him with it. Do this, in all good taste, in private or secret ways that evoke a danger or risk. Like on a line in a store somewhere, in the car, walking down the street. The key to accomplishing this is to make it hot, lustful and only about him. Do not invoke romance in these statements, just how much you desire him. For example, instead of saying something like, “I love how handsome you are” say something like, “You make me so hot when I look at you.” The key here is to make it perfectly clear that he is making you excited. Let him know that he is making you feel a particular way, he is doing something directly to you. Use this tactic sparingly, but not shyly.